Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Hope "less" Life
Hope! the greatest delusion known to man, It blinds you to your surrounding, despair and increases your endurance, just to delay, that which is inevitable. It just doesn't let you give up, on situations which would only get even worse, and would lead one to the point of no return.
..Hope doesn't let you be tough, tough on yourself, a decision you might have taken in desperation. Despair clears your thought process, rationality usurps foolishness, pragmatism replaces abstractness.
...Emotions have made him take crazy decisions. Forgoing everything that seem prospective, & promising for his loved ones. He didn't brood over the outcomes, if he did, he would have never acted. Since a difficult is choice is always between something bad and worse. Altruism is a virtue according to perpetrators of faith, religion, humanity. A self-effacing, forbearing and an all sacrificing man would be celebrated, adulated. He would be admired for relinquishing his happiness. To the extent that a sense of guilt is induced in the minds, whenever something makes someone happy.
With a history of sacrifices for his loved ones, forsaking at the very threshold of success, impervious to the comparisons imposed on him while starting at the same pedestal, rather taking a step back, his only achievement would be their happiness. Subconsciously he knows that it would soon be forgotten and he would be at the crossroads once again. Like ripples in oceans, let go by the ocean in the form of waves vehemently crashing the shores, he has to let go of his desires, ambitions, happiness, because with them they bring guilt. Guilt of indulging! Happiness which is raison de atre of existence, is derived from sacrificing and not indulging.
..He feels suffocated, the very reason, the motivation, the happiness is missing. And the happiness he wished to derive from making his loved ones happy is missing too, his deeds are now forgotten, his small quest for feeling a little happy again, has smothered the recognition of his life of renunciation. Heart has taken a beating, clawed and gnawed by the deathly hallows of life.
Is detachment the key? no he has fallen in love. He can't seem to balance his pains and pleasures. Love pulls him back and life strangles him to the last breath. He gets those near death experience, where thoughts of "hope and despair" are dwarfed by "life and death" emotions. His pride, shielded with the thoughts of detachment, is now drenched vulnerably with the emotions & love. His heart is now reposed precariously in someone's hands. His moments of pleasure now, like a mere mortal are at the mercy of material objects. Every ominous thought, every faliure seems like a impending coup de grace. He wishes to resign before being murdered.
He feels empathized by a song that lingers forever in his mind....
"Life, it seems, will fade away
Drifting further every day
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters, no one else
I have lost the will to live
Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free
Things not what they used to be
Missing one inside of me
Deathly lost, this can't be real
Can't stand this hell I feel
Emptiness is filling me
To the point of agony
Growing darkness taking dawn
I was me, but now he's gone"
..Hope doesn't let you be tough, tough on yourself, a decision you might have taken in desperation. Despair clears your thought process, rationality usurps foolishness, pragmatism replaces abstractness.
...Emotions have made him take crazy decisions. Forgoing everything that seem prospective, & promising for his loved ones. He didn't brood over the outcomes, if he did, he would have never acted. Since a difficult is choice is always between something bad and worse. Altruism is a virtue according to perpetrators of faith, religion, humanity. A self-effacing, forbearing and an all sacrificing man would be celebrated, adulated. He would be admired for relinquishing his happiness. To the extent that a sense of guilt is induced in the minds, whenever something makes someone happy.
With a history of sacrifices for his loved ones, forsaking at the very threshold of success, impervious to the comparisons imposed on him while starting at the same pedestal, rather taking a step back, his only achievement would be their happiness. Subconsciously he knows that it would soon be forgotten and he would be at the crossroads once again. Like ripples in oceans, let go by the ocean in the form of waves vehemently crashing the shores, he has to let go of his desires, ambitions, happiness, because with them they bring guilt. Guilt of indulging! Happiness which is raison de atre of existence, is derived from sacrificing and not indulging.
..He feels suffocated, the very reason, the motivation, the happiness is missing. And the happiness he wished to derive from making his loved ones happy is missing too, his deeds are now forgotten, his small quest for feeling a little happy again, has smothered the recognition of his life of renunciation. Heart has taken a beating, clawed and gnawed by the deathly hallows of life.
Is detachment the key? no he has fallen in love. He can't seem to balance his pains and pleasures. Love pulls him back and life strangles him to the last breath. He gets those near death experience, where thoughts of "hope and despair" are dwarfed by "life and death" emotions. His pride, shielded with the thoughts of detachment, is now drenched vulnerably with the emotions & love. His heart is now reposed precariously in someone's hands. His moments of pleasure now, like a mere mortal are at the mercy of material objects. Every ominous thought, every faliure seems like a impending coup de grace. He wishes to resign before being murdered.
He feels empathized by a song that lingers forever in his mind....
"Life, it seems, will fade away
Drifting further every day
Getting lost within myself
Nothing matters, no one else
I have lost the will to live
Simply nothing more to give
There is nothing more for me
Need the end to set me free
Things not what they used to be
Missing one inside of me
Deathly lost, this can't be real
Can't stand this hell I feel
Emptiness is filling me
To the point of agony
Growing darkness taking dawn
I was me, but now he's gone"
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Panddoorraa
It happens rarely in your life that you behold a dream with open eyes. It rarely happens when 
the reality is more beautiful than a dream, you wish it never stopped.
Avataar is an experience that can only be seen, not told.
A magician has oozed and squeezed all his magic in a utopian saga and a pure spectacle. A movie has been eccentric by not being just a stereotyped sci–fi where massive destruction (2012, Independence Day, matrix) had been the modus of entertainment. This has been a story of construction, of connection of getting back to where we belong. Nature. Our roots.
Technology, Science, Ambitions have taken us really far away from our roots. And for inscrutable reasons we are strangers to our planet, confounded on where we actually belong, perhaps the only species to have inflicted so much damage to its only abode in the universe. And the antagonistic nature is reacting, tsunamis global warming. The kind of rift between nature and its kin cannot be sustained; we are like the pariahs being thrown away from their mother’s lap.
Avataar is like Ozzy Ozzbourne’s mama I am coming home. Nature has accepted us, taken Jack (representing us) in her tutelage. Singing lullabies of adventure, exploration and the Connect! Canvassing the miracles and phenomena of Pandora.
Pandora is an exaggerated Earth. Exaggerated conspicuously and consciously to elucidate the oneness of our being. Where wishes have wings, a genie at one’s disposal to fulfill all one can desire. You may become a part of the mightiest bird and presumptuously rule the skies or ride muscular beast, you might just melt in the glowing waters or get cozy in the branches. You may make the mountains float or fall from a cliff with your head high. You could be humble even after killing someone and die peacefully & live eternally with Eva. You may fall in love with the Gods testifying it.
Our body contains 90% bacteria, viruses and the most basic of cells. Our airs and grace are definitely apparent in our affective demeanor, but we are just a congregation of the most elemental form of life; the origin of life (amoeba). Not us but everything that breathes on this planet is just a manifestation of the original 5 elements.
But why then their fate is at our mercy. Why are we not living in the lap of nature? Why do we need to take a holiday to experience Ladakh or feel the serene waters of Kerela? Why do our children learn about nature in their books or a discovery channel but not through experience?
And why in spite of us living on the planet of grand snow capped Himalayas, exotic wild life, Amazon forests and magnificent oceans, royal Bengal tigers and blue whales, polar ice caps and the tropical forests crave to be in Pandora?
They are all what we are not! They have everything what we don’t! They have a home unconfined, without any proverbial boundaries, they are free.
Freedom, aren’t we free too? No we aren’t I say. We are not in control of our lives. We are bounded by comparison with our peers. We are answerable to our own ambitions and expectations. We are guilty of not gratifying because of our schedules. We long to meet someone, but cannot take a leave. We cannot answer back at our bosses’ dogmatic behaviors. We live in a society build more with dogmas and less with experimentations.
But I am grateful that there is one thing that is consistent in Na’vis and us. That is Love. And with Love there is hope, of being liberated like them.
the reality is more beautiful than a dream, you wish it never stopped.Avataar is an experience that can only be seen, not told.
A magician has oozed and squeezed all his magic in a utopian saga and a pure spectacle. A movie has been eccentric by not being just a stereotyped sci–fi where massive destruction (2012, Independence Day, matrix) had been the modus of entertainment. This has been a story of construction, of connection of getting back to where we belong. Nature. Our roots.
Technology, Science, Ambitions have taken us really far away from our roots. And for inscrutable reasons we are strangers to our planet, confounded on where we actually belong, perhaps the only species to have inflicted so much damage to its only abode in the universe. And the antagonistic nature is reacting, tsunamis global warming. The kind of rift between nature and its kin cannot be sustained; we are like the pariahs being thrown away from their mother’s lap.
Avataar is like Ozzy Ozzbourne’s mama I am coming home. Nature has accepted us, taken Jack (representing us) in her tutelage. Singing lullabies of adventure, exploration and the Connect! Canvassing the miracles and phenomena of Pandora.
Pandora is an exaggerated Earth. Exaggerated conspicuously and consciously to elucidate the oneness of our being. Where wishes have wings, a genie at one’s disposal to fulfill all one can desire. You may become a part of the mightiest bird and presumptuously rule the skies or ride muscular beast, you might just melt in the glowing waters or get cozy in the branches. You may make the mountains float or fall from a cliff with your head high. You could be humble even after killing someone and die peacefully & live eternally with Eva. You may fall in love with the Gods testifying it.
Our body contains 90% bacteria, viruses and the most basic of cells. Our airs and grace are definitely apparent in our affective demeanor, but we are just a congregation of the most elemental form of life; the origin of life (amoeba). Not us but everything that breathes on this planet is just a manifestation of the original 5 elements.
But why then their fate is at our mercy. Why are we not living in the lap of nature? Why do we need to take a holiday to experience Ladakh or feel the serene waters of Kerela? Why do our children learn about nature in their books or a discovery channel but not through experience?
And why in spite of us living on the planet of grand snow capped Himalayas, exotic wild life, Amazon forests and magnificent oceans, royal Bengal tigers and blue whales, polar ice caps and the tropical forests crave to be in Pandora?
They are all what we are not! They have everything what we don’t! They have a home unconfined, without any proverbial boundaries, they are free.
Freedom, aren’t we free too? No we aren’t I say. We are not in control of our lives. We are bounded by comparison with our peers. We are answerable to our own ambitions and expectations. We are guilty of not gratifying because of our schedules. We long to meet someone, but cannot take a leave. We cannot answer back at our bosses’ dogmatic behaviors. We live in a society build more with dogmas and less with experimentations.
But I am grateful that there is one thing that is consistent in Na’vis and us. That is Love. And with Love there is hope, of being liberated like them.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Tips for happy travelling
I've been travelling for a while now, and its not just a fixed location just those brief sojourns in god forsaken smaller towns of U.P. and Bihar. Its like before you acclimitaze to a city and get accustomed to its viccissitudes, you have to move to another location. The moment you commend your heart in an abode, you have to abandon that dwelling place and just move on.
Atleast, by this alogrithm of travelling, i don't find time to identify myself with a particular city, so I never miss it. But then, I never feel that homely cozy warmth & comfort anywhere.
Someone said that "one step in travelling is worth more than reading hundred books"
because the use of travelling is to regulate imagination by reality, and instead of thinking how things may be, to see them as they are. Fine, that is a solace for me, instead of sitting here in meerut(U.P.) & wondering how the fading yet glaring sun would be setting in marine drive, or how my friends would make merry in red box - bandra, or romeo(my black labrador) would curiously yet innocently be gazing at a passerby.
In the same trip someone also told me about "Vihar". The same word which was used to christen the eastern state "Bihar". Though the culture and philosophy of the state has digressed and polluted a million times by millions of its burbaks the philosophy still in its essence is quintessential. Vihar is basically a Buddhist philosphy in which Buddhha recommends Vihar for even person. Vihar is constant travelling, since if you stop somewhere you consider it as your home and get attached to it. And once you get attached to it, you miss it and you forget the purpose of your travelling.
Hence even I, when on the cusp of embarking on a long ardous and tiring journey, compel myself to forget that I belong to a place. I start the considering the universe as my abode, and its just shifting rooms then.
Or if one follows the Gita, its just the change of position of a destructible manifestation of five elements, though the soul is omnipresent.
P.S. Right now the itinerary Aurangabad-Delhi_Dehradun-Haridwar-Roorkee-Muzzaffarnagar-Bijnyor-Meerut-Kanpur-Jaipur-Ahmedabad-Mumbai-Aurangabad and back
Atleast, by this alogrithm of travelling, i don't find time to identify myself with a particular city, so I never miss it. But then, I never feel that homely cozy warmth & comfort anywhere.
Someone said that "one step in travelling is worth more than reading hundred books"
because the use of travelling is to regulate imagination by reality, and instead of thinking how things may be, to see them as they are. Fine, that is a solace for me, instead of sitting here in meerut(U.P.) & wondering how the fading yet glaring sun would be setting in marine drive, or how my friends would make merry in red box - bandra, or romeo(my black labrador) would curiously yet innocently be gazing at a passerby.
In the same trip someone also told me about "Vihar". The same word which was used to christen the eastern state "Bihar". Though the culture and philosophy of the state has digressed and polluted a million times by millions of its burbaks the philosophy still in its essence is quintessential. Vihar is basically a Buddhist philosphy in which Buddhha recommends Vihar for even person. Vihar is constant travelling, since if you stop somewhere you consider it as your home and get attached to it. And once you get attached to it, you miss it and you forget the purpose of your travelling.
Hence even I, when on the cusp of embarking on a long ardous and tiring journey, compel myself to forget that I belong to a place. I start the considering the universe as my abode, and its just shifting rooms then.
Or if one follows the Gita, its just the change of position of a destructible manifestation of five elements, though the soul is omnipresent.
P.S. Right now the itinerary Aurangabad-Delhi_Dehradun-Haridwar-Roorkee-Muzzaffarnagar-Bijnyor-Meerut-Kanpur-Jaipur-Ahmedabad-Mumbai-Aurangabad and back
Monday, July 6, 2009
I want to witness a miracle
Yeah..I want to witness a miracle. To believe in something incredible. Just to believe. They say ignorance is a bliss, and knowledge isn't. I believed in everything until my rationality refuted it.
I want to believe to get that hope in life. A miracle which might corroborate the very purpose of life, or something supernatural, something existential , or may be God. Which might help me raise above the algorithm life-to-death every human follows, raises me from the trivial litany of happiness and mourning. which is more than what science prescribes.
I want to do that justice to my rationality, which is looking for something it cannot usurp, it wants something to overpower it, something that dwarfs it, smothers it.
Something that tells me, it owns everything, something that tells me that am not that independant being as it seems to be, 'cause my independance exists only between my life and death, and after that even I wouldn't exist. I want to witness a miracle that gives a meaning to my existence.
I want to believe to get that hope in life. A miracle which might corroborate the very purpose of life, or something supernatural, something existential , or may be God. Which might help me raise above the algorithm life-to-death every human follows, raises me from the trivial litany of happiness and mourning. which is more than what science prescribes.
I want to do that justice to my rationality, which is looking for something it cannot usurp, it wants something to overpower it, something that dwarfs it, smothers it.
Something that tells me, it owns everything, something that tells me that am not that independant being as it seems to be, 'cause my independance exists only between my life and death, and after that even I wouldn't exist. I want to witness a miracle that gives a meaning to my existence.
Anecdotes
In a business meeting with a client in my hotel room at patna...
Me: what will you have sir?
Client: Nothing. I just had my breakfast.
Me: Atleast Tea or Coffee
Client: Hmm okay..
Me: (calling room service) Room no 406. can you fetch tea or coffee?
RS(Bihari): Hain???kya??
Me :chai ya coffee milegi?
RS : Mil to jaayegi. Laate hain.
Me :Dono mat lana ..ek he lana jo bhi hai.
RS: ok
Me: (Hungry after 10 mins) Biryani milegi
RS: han miljaayegi,laate hain
Me :accha chai bola tha laye nahi.
RS : Haan sir bola tha. Par doodh nahi hai.
Me: batay kyon nahi.(to client) would you have something else??
Client : Fresh lime soda
ME : Please get me fresh lime soda.
RS :Nahi milega. sirf nimbu paani hai soda nahi hai.
Me : !!!!! (embarrased) will you have something else.
Client :..anything!!
ME : Mirinida hai?
RS : nahi thumbs up hai..layein?
ME. jo bhi hai lao.
RS guys come to my room with a bottle of sprite. I ha that inquisitive look on my face..And am sure he wanted to say....sir yeh thanda hee to hai!!
Me: what will you have sir?
Client: Nothing. I just had my breakfast.
Me: Atleast Tea or Coffee
Client: Hmm okay..
Me: (calling room service) Room no 406. can you fetch tea or coffee?
RS(Bihari): Hain???kya??
Me :chai ya coffee milegi?
RS : Mil to jaayegi. Laate hain.
Me :Dono mat lana ..ek he lana jo bhi hai.
RS: ok
Me: (Hungry after 10 mins) Biryani milegi
RS: han miljaayegi,laate hain
Me :accha chai bola tha laye nahi.
RS : Haan sir bola tha. Par doodh nahi hai.
Me: batay kyon nahi.(to client) would you have something else??
Client : Fresh lime soda
ME : Please get me fresh lime soda.
RS :Nahi milega. sirf nimbu paani hai soda nahi hai.
Me : !!!!! (embarrased) will you have something else.
Client :..anything!!
ME : Mirinida hai?
RS : nahi thumbs up hai..layein?
ME. jo bhi hai lao.
RS guys come to my room with a bottle of sprite. I ha that inquisitive look on my face..And am sure he wanted to say....sir yeh thanda hee to hai!!
Anecdotes
Last week I came for a romantic sojourn in patna. I was conveyed here by nice 2 tier boggie. The so called elite of the train..the elite of a limited universe. Actually its better to be an elite persona in a limited universe, than a pedestrian millionare in a downtown area..
Anyways coming back to the platform...I was completely loaded. a back pack, my guitar, a massive suitcase and the narrow aisle in train. It was an ardous tast to get all of it to the main platform.. A coolie approached me proffering his service..and what a look of attitude and supercilliousness he had..with that naughty smirk on his face when he saw me fiddlig with the luggage.. I gave it back to him....A smile grew on my face to...when i pulled the lever and brought the wheels of the suitcase to life..Effortlessly i was able to drag it along the platform.Within that moment of triumph..i saw the coolie disppointed...his "bony" had gone..
Machines were invented to make our task easier. Wheels were used to make our work simpler but not to snaffle them right away from someone..Irony it seems but true..
Anyways coming back to the platform...I was completely loaded. a back pack, my guitar, a massive suitcase and the narrow aisle in train. It was an ardous tast to get all of it to the main platform.. A coolie approached me proffering his service..and what a look of attitude and supercilliousness he had..with that naughty smirk on his face when he saw me fiddlig with the luggage.. I gave it back to him....A smile grew on my face to...when i pulled the lever and brought the wheels of the suitcase to life..Effortlessly i was able to drag it along the platform.Within that moment of triumph..i saw the coolie disppointed...his "bony" had gone..
Machines were invented to make our task easier. Wheels were used to make our work simpler but not to snaffle them right away from someone..Irony it seems but true..
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
